


In the end

by kilala2tail



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Introspection, One Shot, Poetry, Stream of Consciousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-28 07:07:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13266285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kilala2tail/pseuds/kilala2tail
Summary: He found peace





	In the end

He was tired

_He tried so hard to keep going_

So deep in his soul

_But then he had a thought_

He wanted it to stop

_Because_

So he had an idea

_In the end_

Soon, he would rest

_It doesn't even matter_

\----

He was scared

_He started scaring others_

They never went away

_His fears, or theirs_

He didn't want to be a hero

_That dream left long ago_

He just wanted to stop being the villain

_If people could change, why couldn't he?_

He couldn't edit the narrative

_What was done, was done_

But he could write himself out of it

_Villains always fell in the end_

\----

He missed her

_She feared him_

He loved her

_She despised him_

He wanted to save her

_He was her worst enemy_

So he would

_Goodbye Zoe_

\----

He didn't mean to hurt them

_That's all he seemed to do_

But he didn't want to hurt

_That's all they ever did_

He didn't know what he felt

_Love, fear, hate, pain_

Would they even miss him?

_Would they finally understand?_

\----

He didn't mean to lash out

_It's not your fault_

He knew the kid was innocent

_I need help_

But then he found the letter

_But don't worry_

And he made a choice

_I'll be going soon_

So he walked away

_It'll be okay_

He wouldn't hurt innocents anymore

_Forgive me, Evan Hansen_

\----

They found him in the park

_He never thought they'd come looking_

They found the empty bottle

_He knew no one would notice it missing_

They found the blood and vomit

_He expected the pain, that was okay_

They found the tears and scars

_He no longer had to hide them_

They found a note in his pocket

_He knew it wasn't fair, but it was too late for that_

They found his final words

_His scrawled handwriting printed a single “Sorry” on the page_

They found the end

_He found peace_

**Author's Note:**

> What is sleep and where do I get some. How do humans function on four to five hours several consecutive nights.
> 
> I'm so tired.
> 
> So anyway. Decided I'm just gonna run with this writing mood I'm in for as long as it goes. It's good practice. And you have to be in the right mood to play Chicken, ya know. No fun otherwise.
> 
> Can you tell I was half asleep when I came up with this and didn't bother to change much? Kinda felt the "stream of consciousness" vibe was fitting. Keep on doing you, lovelies. Until next time, happy reading.


End file.
